D400 wishlist

Here’s what I want from the mythical D400 (or D7300 – I’m not picky about model names).  Because obviously Nikon reads this blog and uses it to drive all their product decisions.

1. ≥ 50 image buffer.  In 14-bit RAW.
2. ≥ 10 FPS.  I’ll even accept complete viewfinder blackout if it means getting beyond 10 FPS.  Sony actually have a new 28 MP sensor that is capable of 18 FPS read-out.  I’ll take it.
3. UHS-II support.  And if I can actually find a card that can really do 300 MB/s, I expect my camera to write at that speed.  None of this half-arsed 60%ish crap that all the UHS-I Nikons have.
4. Lower noise.  Across the range, not just at high ISO.  ISO 100 isn’t as clean as I’d like, and I’d really love to be able to use ISO 3200 or above in typical use.  Bonus points for pushing the native ISO lower (50’d be nice, at least).
5. More, smaller autofocus points, that fill the frame.  Just give me a few hundred in an even grid.  All cross-type, all f/2-optimised at least, and all good down to f8 and -4EV at least.  And better autofocus generally.
6. On-sensor phase detection autofocus.  I’d actually be rather interested in a mirrorless DX F-mount body, but even with a traditional DSLR, I want usable autofocus when shooting video.  I’ll make it easier for you, though – I don’t need hundreds, or the high light sensitivity of the ‘viewfinder’ PDAF points.  Just give me some, at least.
7. Let me adjust shooting settings in video mode (aperture, for example).  While recording, too.
8. ≥ 4K video @ 60 FPS.  At serious bitrates – at least 200 Mbps.  Preferably with a H.265 encoder option.
9. And/or, full-sensor read-out video.  I’d accept being stuck with 1080p60 if it were at least from the full sensor.  But it still has to have higher bitrates than today’s mediocre offerings.
10. Put the top-plate LCD back the way it was, on the D7100.  What the hell, D7200?  What the hell?
11. Quieter shutter.  Something more like the D810, or better, preferably.
12. GPS.
13. Deeper, wider hand grip.  My fingers are in fact more than an inch long.  How ’bout that.
14. Moar pixels!  But honestly, only if it’s amazingly more (≥ 40 MP) or otherwise at no noticeable cost w.r.t. image quality, or performance.
15. Real weather-sealing.  Pentax are kicking your arse here.  I should not have to bat an eyelid at rain.  I should be able to test Sigma’s 150-600 S and have it fail from moisture or dust damage before the camera body.
16. Lighter.  Always lighter.
17. Wider, more recessed viewfinder cup.  I shouldn’t have to force my face through the camera in order to see the whole frame, nor buy third-party cups to actually block out glare.
18. High-speed video options (> 60 FPS).  But only if it’s at usable resolutions – none of this “400 FPS but only at a tiny resolution” crap like the Nikon Vn series.  Even little tiny GoPros can do this.  Seriously, you should be ashamed of yourselves.
19. Magnify the viewfinder image in 1.3x mode.  I really want to like and use 1.3x mode, but it feels so pointless today.
20. Dedicated AF-ON button.  Sometimes I actually want to use the AE-L button for its labelled purpose.  Just give me two damn buttons already.
21. Longer body.  I have actual human hands, not baby monkey ones.  I want a camera that actually fits in them, without my bottom two fingers falling off the bottom.  (without spending $7,000 on a D4s)
22. Wifi.  But only if you actually provide a remote control app that’s full-featured.  Don’t even bother including your current wifi system.  I already had to buy a CamRanger because of your half-arsedness.
23. Provide an AC adapter for what it actually costs – i.e. $5.  $120?!  Are you insane?  Here’s an idea:  just integrate USB 3 as a USB-C connector (or better yet, Thunderbolt 3).  Single-port AC power, clean video output, and tethering.  And in that case, give me at least two such ports, so I can tether and AC power simultaneously.
24. Touch-screen.  Surprised to see it so far down the list?  Meh.  All I really want is double-tap to zoom and touch-to-focus.

While you’re at it, make with the integrating of PF elements into the rest of the telephoto range.  I want a 400/4 PF.  Or an 80-400 PF.  Or better yet, make it 50-500/4 and weigh no more than the current 80-400.  ’cause, you know, easy, right? ;)